Secret Warrior: Mental Health in Sport
“The coach’s responsibilities do not slow down regardless of how one feels”
In 2000, Joanne P. McCallie left the University of Maine as its most successful coach of all-time having taken her team to six-straight NCAA tournaments whilst being named conference coach of the year three times.
Her ensuing head coaching roles at MSU and Duke were equally triumphant- marked by record seasons, further coach of the year feats and regular post-season appearances.
McCallie’s Secret Warrior: A Coach and Fighter, On and Off the Court is NOT a conventional autobiography, however.
Recounting her battle with bipolar disorder throughout the majority of her coaching career, the book shines an essential light on the stigma that is still attached to mental health conditions in much of sport;
“By bringing my personal battle out of the shadows, and into the broader light of life challenges, I hope to educate, enlighten, and give a voice to the secret warrior in all of us.”
A story that is as laudable as it is disconcerting, McCallie’s success amidst dealing with her "unquiet mind” and the attached anxiety of negative reactions by her players, parents, media and employers whilst all the time trying to navigate the “the uncertain and confusing nature of coaching” has many valuable lessons.
Despite some progress being made, sport still has some distance to make up in gaining both a better understanding of mental health struggles in athletes and coaches, as well as eliminating the stigma that is often deeply attached.
Coaching With a Mental Health Disorder
Following her diagnosis with bipolar disorder (which included several forced periods of time in medical facilities) McCallie was faced with a dichotomy of coming to terms with the condition whilst being highly susceptible to the irregularities and complexities associated with the head coaching position;
“I chose a career filled with developing people that’s almost bipolar in nature- coaching the ups and downs of the immediate need for success whilst balancing the issues of student athletes is the perfect recipe for mania and depression. The highs are very high and the lows are very low.”
In learning to manage her condition, McCallie was dependent on daily medication which she kept hidden from almost everyone.
Throughout her daily struggle to understand her brain, thoughts and feelings- and despite it being part and parcel of each training session and match- she felt unable to address the issue publicly.
McCallie was beset with concerns of how her condition might impede her ability to recruit the best athletes.
She was equally anxious of how future employment opportunities may be blocked by uninformed thoughts and judgmental reactions.
Slowing Down
In looking back on her journey, it’s striking that one of the central regrets McCallie discusses seems to be so common amongst coaches, particularly early in their coaching careers; the inability to “to tap the breaks.”
In striving for achievement and success, many coaches falsely believe that there’s merit in a lack of sleep, saying ‘yes’ to everything, being in the office late into the night and dismissing many (obvious) elements of self-care.
The great irony is that in attempting to make a difference, individualism often results in underperformance, unhappiness and reduced empathy.
Due in part to her condition, McCallie recalls often functioning on “three hours of sleep- and sometimes none” and believing that this was in some way a competitive advantage.
In describing her “overwhelming sense of inadequacy as a coach, wife and parent,” it’s startling that she was back coaching a week after being released from hospital following a manic episode.
Similarly, McCallie describes working from home the day after giving birth to her daughter, Maddie whilst being back in the office less than a week after suffering the heartbreak of a miscarriage.
McCallie recalls “wishing I could have told myself to slow down" and lamenting her inability to listen as a result of consistently pushing to do more.
In sharing the lessons she learnt through this time, there’s great value for any coaches who believe relentlessly pushing themselves might be in their team’s long-term interest:
Don’t attempt to build something in a day, week or month- understand it takes time.
“Learn to be still”- regularly pause and see the beauty in life.
Don’t allow intensity to overpower happiness- “smile more”.
“Listen with intent”- there’s great value in the stories of family, players or others in your life.
“Find the time to eat well, do regular exercise and go to bed early”.
Rely on others and learn to delegate- “trust your staff and challenge them to rise”.
Set the tone but allow others to work in concert with you- understand the human dimension of each person and every project.
Seek to lead with “valour”- be selfless in adversity and relentless in your pursuits.
My Thoughts:
This book was recommended to me by an elite coach I work with who faces their own mental health struggles.
It served as a timely reminder that, as head coaches with responsibility for the players and staff in our team, we are obliged to be better educated on mental health conditions that our people may be battling with. This includes not just recognizing and supporting those individuals ourselves but ensuring that others feel emboldened to do the same.
Regardless of the source of statistics we may choose to heed, its prominence is far greater than the awareness and advocacy that currently exists in sports.
The Rugby Player’s Association (RPA) revealed that 62% of retired players have suffered from mental health issues. The Australian Institute of Sport (AIS) cited an 11% rise in just four years of athletes seeking treatment for mental health conditions whilst the NCAA reported in 2022 that 40% of head coaches feel mental exhaustion “constantly”.
Without wishing to downplay the severity of mental health conditions experienced by many, greater openness and awareness of management would likely result in increased performance of both athletes and support staff.